Natural and Logic Consequences vs. Punishment-
Where
did we get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, we
have to make them feel worse first? Children do better when they feel
better. Mistakes are opportunities to learn. We should focus on
solutions, not punishments or rewards. We shouldn’t rescue children from
their own life experiences. We should let them experience
disappointment, elation, guilt, shame, joy, sadness, and anger so they
can learn how to feel and express all of their emotions.
Setting Limits-
Children
need to feel unconditional love and acceptance from the adults who care
for them. We should talk to them, listen to them, play with them, sing
with them, laugh with them, and learn from them. We should give them
choices whenever possible. We should get down on their level, look them
in the eyes, and speak using a calm voice. We should accept all of their
emotions and help them find words to express them. We should also give
them firm limits by following through with our word, with dignity and
respect. We should give them the responsibility of working out their own
problems. Our main goal should be to help children develop an internal
locus of control, instead of relying on external means for controlling
their behavior. We are human, too. When we make mistakes we should
apologize and change our behavior. We should give them time to react and
time to make decisions about their own behavior.
Do you want to
know more about the positive discipline philosophy and learn how you can
apply the tools and principals in your own family? Or maybe you have specific questions about food battles, temper tantrums, sleep issues, or potty training?
Developing Capable Young People
Tiny Tribe Parent Education Night
Wednesday, June 12th 6:00-8:00pm
If interested, please email Jena at jenainghram@yahoo.com

Jena
has a BA in Human Services from Western Washington University and
sixteen years of early childcare experience. Since 1996, she has worked
as a nanny, an infant teacher, toddler teacher, preschool teacher,
mentor teacher, program supervisor, and director. For the past nine
years she has operated a small home-based childcare and preschool
program, called Tiny Tribe, in West Seattle. In 2008, she and her
husband, Scott, became the proud parents of their four-year old daughter,
Layla. Jena is a trained facilitator of Steven Glenn's “Developing
Capable Young People” parenting series and Jane Nelson's "Positive Discipline". She loves working with children
and considers it her life's work.